Joke Of The Day

April 2, 2020

Day 19 of isolation and it's like Vegas in my house. We're losing money by the minute, cocktails are acceptable at any hour, and nobody knows what time it is!

April 1, 2020

What did the yogi say to his dog?

Nama, stay!

March 31, 2020

Why did the computer squeak? 

Someone stepped on its mouse!

March 30, 2020

Why did the yogi refuse anesthesia when having his wisdom tooth removed?

He wanted to transcend-dental-medication!

March 29, 2020

Why can't you trust trees?

Because they are shady!

March 28, 2020

What do you call birds that stick together?

Velcrows!

March 27, 2020

Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

March 26, 2020

How do you manage a pumpkin addiction?

Get a pumpkin patch,

March 25, 2020

My boss asked me to make a presentation and said I should start it with a joke. So I put my paystub on the first slide.

March 24, 2020

So much for hoarding ...

March 23, 2020

"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu."

March 22, 2020

Once my dog ate all the Scrabble tiles ..

For days he kept leaving little messages around the house!

March 21, 2020

What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

March 20, 2020

What kind of exercise do lazy people do?

Diddly-squats

March 19, 2020

What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare-line.

March 18, 2020